Katie Bad

Verse 1

Katie’s hunting and gathering again,

Not for food, just for questionable friends.

She’s mixing her meds with tonic and lime,

Says she’s “microdosing self-love this time.”

Wears sunglasses at Whole Foods’ bar,

Says, “I’m not drunk, I’m avant-garde.”

Took her phone in the pool last week,

Still posting quotes about being unique.

Chorus

Katie bad, hunting and gathering again,

She’s a gin monster with a heartbreak grin.

Got voted off the island for Coachella twenty-three,

Now she’s chasing Palm Beach dreams and bad company.

She’s a Samantha with a group-chat plan,

Still drunk-texting mustache man.

He’s got a boat and no emotional core —

She says, “Make lover to me,” then falls on the floor.

Verse 2

She was a cheerleader in middle school,

Now she’s ER Bradley’s after-hours cool.

PTA outfits, platinum tan,

“Networking,” aka shots with the band.

She hooked up with Marcos, yeah, that tracks,

Said “it didn’t count” ’cause she wore his hat.

Has three exes in the same room,

Still somehow flirts with all of them, too.

Chorus

Katie bad, she’s chaos couture,

Says “I’m healing,” no one’s sure.

Drinks her breakfast, skips her lunch,

Thinks accountability’s just a brunch.

Palm Beach Barbie, unpaid tab,

Tells her therapist, “I’m in my fab era, babe.”

Katie bad, yeah, she’s doing just fine —

In the group photo, middle finger up high.

Bridge

She’s a walking apology in heels too tall,

Cried in a bathroom at a charity ball.

Her gin bottle’s basically her plus-one,

But somehow, she’s still the fun one.

Outro

Katie bad, she’s a lifestyle brand,

Sells chaos by the Instagram.

Mustache man’s still ghosting slow —

She shrugs, says, “Whatever, I’ll find another boat.”

Yeah, Katie bad…

And honestly?

Same.